Right.... so this is going to be long... so yeah... also pretty serious.... so if you don't want to read either of those things right now I suggest you leave this thread.

So as most of you probably know my parents are divorced. No biggie. They got divorced 5 or 6 years ago, shortly after my mom got out of the hospital after suffering a brain aneurysm. As a result of the aneurysm she has trouble using her right hand, but other than that she is completely fine. Just some background info here.

Ever since my mom got out of the hospital she has been different. She is meaner, grouchier, yells more, and is pretty much just and a**h***. She has me and my brother do everything around the house and pays people to do the rest. The only "chore" she does is cook, but she always complains about how we never help out. Sure.

Anyway, since the divorce I have never gotten along with my mother. We always had yelling matches, I was constantly in trouble, etc. 90% of the time though it was ridiculous things that would happen and the result would be her taking away all electronics for 4 months or something like that. You can even ask my brother. It's ridiculous. And most of the time the whole fight would start because she would start it.

We have been battling constantly for the past 5-6 years. I never have a problem with my dad or with anyone else. I only fight with her. But I'm the one that's the problem. Every time we have a fight she always makes up lies about me after and tells her parents (my grandparents) and her sister (my aunt), so now she has that entire side of the family convinced I am a child from hell that beats her everyday and s*** like that. And my aunt, who is equally ridiculous, keeps recommending that my mom call the police and contact all these different government agencies and have me taken away and stuff. Wow, thanks Aunt Terri. I appreciate it. She (my aunt) called the police on her husband the other day because he got mad and threw something at a wall. So now you have that mentality combined with the craziness that is my mom. She has threatened to call the cops on me multiple times but luckily my dad has been able to talk her out of it.

Yesterday we were having a party at my mom's house to celebrate my grandma's birthday as well as my great grandma's birthday. The party was at 12:30 (it was a brunch thing). That morning my cat jumps on me and wakes me up. I look at my watch. It's 12:15. My mom hadn't even bothered to wake me up. I go down at start asking her what's up and she starts yelling at me for not getting up and helping her get ready for the party. At this point I am so beyond frustrated. I knock over a few chairs in anger. That's when my aunt arrives. She sees the chair on the ground and my mom tells her that I got mad at her for no reason and I trashed the house. My aunt tells her that she needs to call the cops. I go upstairs and spend the entire 6 hour party in my room with no food. My dad picked me up after the party.

My mom texted my dad today. She said that from now on whenever she feels "threatened" she is no longer going to consult my dad first and is just going to call the cops on me and have me taken away. She also said that my dad needs to take me to a therapist weekly or she is going to call PIN (Parent In Need) and have them assign me a therapist or something.

Guys. There is nothing wrong with me. She forced me to go to a therapist years ago and that therapist told my dad that my mom is wrong and that she is the one with the problem. She made that therapist go bye-bye. She also made me go to a psychologist to find out what is wrong with me. The psychologist said that I am perfectly fine. She didn't want to hear that either.

I am so done with everything right now. I want to just stay in bed for the rest of my life. Life is just one big load of bulls***.

Why don't you just live with your dad?

In this kind of situation there really isn't much you can do. I mean, normally the solution would be to talk to her about it but it seems like she'd be a lovely lady about it so I guess that's not an option.

The best thing you can do is just keep all your anger in. This isn't at all healthy, but it is the best you can really do.

But if these government agencies cant find anything wrong with you, they won't do anything,

It's all stupid and I know that, but you really don't have anything you can do. Due to all these dumb *** feminists, your dad can do absolutely nothing, you are completely in your Mom's control.

And PIN can't do anything if they CANT find anything wrong with you.

If the therapist assigned to you tells the govrerntment that the problem actually is your mom, then they probably would force you and your brother to live with your dad.

But really, who knows.

Good luck man, I wish you the best.

Barathemos : In a month I will be able to live with my dad, but that would mean switching schools. So it's a lose-lose situation. Once I'm 17 and I can drive to school I might be able to do that if we can find some kind of loophole or something.

"Lovely lady" XD

The problem is, they will listen to whatever my mom says and take that as the truth over what I say. So my mom could tell them what she tells my aunt and they would believe her. So until college I'm pretty much screwed.

tgags- If your school system is anything like mine, you should be able to live with your dad and not change schools. They don't even look at your proof of residency, they just make sure you have one. And really, you could use one from your current residence to stay at that school when enrollment comes around.

And, 17? Can you not drive when you are 16?

And no. That's not really how it works. They wouldn't listen to your mom all that much, just your aunt is (probably) more trusting in your mom; however a random stranger wouldn't really side with any. As as long as they legitimately listen to you, there is a pretty good chance that they would end up siding with you on this.

tgags123 : Having a psychotic mother who everyone listens to is generally a bad thing, however since you can move in with your dad in a month, you might be in the somewhat-clear.

However I do believe that the government agencies would have to look into a good number of sources, besides your mom and aunt. Otherwise it'd just be a complete bias war and nothing will get done.

Surviving a month of living with a psycho will most likely be awful and extremely difficult, but possible. then you might not have to see her ever again..

Also, most agencies would take into account the brain aneurysm because I'm pretty sure that could lead to brain damage.

Since she said she was going to call the cops and have them take you away EVERY time she feels threatened, you might have to bulls*** your way through it by saying "sorry" and "OK" a lot. Avoiding all chances for a fight to start is a high priority.

But I'm sure that will be near impossible to do without getting mad and/or killing her and dumping her in a muddy ditch somewhere in the bayou.... So I wish you luck.

Let's all hope things get better

Barathemos : At 16 I can get my learner's permit, but I can only drive for practice. A parent needs to be in the passenger seat. At 17 I can drive for reals.

yoshirulez! : Even if I choose to live with my dad primarily I'll still have to live with her part time until I am out of college, unfortunately. :/

I'm really sorry to hear that. It'll get better once your with your dad, or even better, in college (definitely go to college if you can).

You have it far worse, but I can relate. Something VERY similar happened to me. Luckily I was already a sophomore in high school. I only had to deal with it for two years. Now I'm in college and relationships are basically repaired (even though they were at their lowest low the summer before I went to college-Summer 2014).

The trust never comes back, but at least it's no longer a terrible relationship. I no longer have to fear for my life or plan to run away, and I care about living now.
I still have minor PTSD (something you might end up having), but I'm mostly better.

I'm hoping for the best man. Hang in there.

tgags123 : Different rules in New York? Strange.

And why would you have to live with your mom? If your parents are divorced you can choose.

And if you take classes over the summer you can go to college early :X *cough*mohammed *cough*

Like yushee said, you just have to bs your way through the time you are with her and literally be a PERFECT child. If you don't things really could go bad.

The problem is that she'll find fault with tgags no matter how perfect he acts. Being "too good" or not acting affected by her words will just make her act out more.

He'll just have to bear her wrath to the extent where the least damage is caused.
It's a fine line, and a lot of luck is involved.

I'm guessing he'll just have to be detached from the situation while pretending otherwise.
At least that way you keep your sanity. =P

Then hows this? Munipulation.

Fight fire with fire.

Do EXACTLY what she is doing right back at her. If the tide is turned in her favor no matter what, then you doing what she does will make neither of you believable.

If you can't win, at least get a middle ground.

Maybe?

tgags123 : Wow...That's just awful. I'm so sorry you're going through that. I think you should take that chance to live with your dad, if possible. That will at least reduce the amount of times she can do stuff like that to you. I would hide from her as much as possible, and never be alone with her. Try to stick close to your brother when you go places. I really hope you get to go to a far off college or something.

EideticMemory : Yeah, I'm definitely going to college. I used to be scared of college but not anymore. More stress may come with all of the work, but I get rid of the stress that I have at home.

Barathemos : Yeah. Different laws.

The agreement that was made during the divorce was that they would have joint custody. So unless my mom is actually convicted of something by CPS or something like that I would still have to live with her part time.

You know me. Do you think I could be one to be a "perfect child"?

yoshirulez! : Yeah, because people will totally listen to me...

tgags- That's an awful but understandable law

Well that's gay wrong. Or you could just say you're scared by your mom and you wouldn't have to live with her anymore

And yes you can be the perfect child if you really apply yourself! lol absolutely not But good luck being perfect

And that includes no sarcasm or cussing

I'm really sorry to hear that man. Sometimes, I don't get along with my mom, but hey, it happens. I would recommend Barathemos's "perfect" act. You may not like how you're parents or mom acts, but there's not much you can do to make life much better.

I really don't want to take sides here, nor should I. If your report is true about your mom however, I can kindof feel for you, though I've never had it that bad with my mom. I do know what it's like when your parents misunderstand you though.

Like I said though, the perfect act is probably what's best. When I disagree with my parents, I just remember two things.

1. I'm not paying the rent or for food.

2. It's much more advantageous to just go along with them as the boss, since they're taking care of me, giving me free food, ect. I should really be grateful too them. This allows me to save my money for my own house rather than spending it somewhere and renting someplace. Ya know?


I'm not saying your mom is right and that you should just go with it, it's just mathematically it makes sense. And I believe what you're saying. Between you and me, I'm sure there are a few things you could be doing differently.

I know I don't always treat my parents the best. Anyways, I hope things get better for you. It sucks to be in that kind of position, but don't let that keep you from thinking of how you can make it better. Ya know?

tgags123 : Hi there! Whoa, just whoa. And I thought I had it bad not having a father. I can't believe this situation, but if you and your brother band together, you just might be able to swing living with your dad. After all, the paper does not really mean that they can force you to live with your mom part time. If you fight hard enough, and your brother backs you up. You just might be able to not have to deal with her. (Wow, I cannot believe that I am even saying anything like this. I have never done this before.) Anyways, I am really sorry that you had to go through all this, but I would not say that you should fight fire with fire, that only puts you in the "doubt" range where they might think that you are part of the problem. If you can, try to catch her on tape (without her knowing it) that way, you can prove that you are innocent. Also, like someone else said, just try to have your brother around when you are with your mom. Otherwise try to avoid her. (man I can't believe I said that either) When she gets fired up over nothing, try to keep your cool (I KNOW that is not easy) but it might help you to think that if you do keep your cool, it makes your mom look worse. (I know that's a real help, but it might just work. Your mom can't blow something out of proportion if there is nothing there!) Anyways, I hope that this is at least somewhat helpful. Be praying for you.

Believe it or not, I had the same BS growing up at your age, plus worse.

I want to express the importance of not acting out, and just dealing with it. Meaning, talk it out, and if that's not possible, don't try to challenge your parents or aunt (or get mad and destructive).

I went through similar situation and I ended up in Juvenile Hall.

Also, if you say or do stupid stuff (because of their stupidity), when you get to about my age (30), you'll feel deep regret for it.

I'm not going to even try to offer advice since I'm not in your position, nor have I ever been. I'll leave the advice to those who are/have been. I just want you to know you have our (Vizzed community) support, and that I'm praying for you. Try to hang in there, man. It won't last forever.

Sword legion : Yes but it is just unbearable. The worst part is that she has turned the rest of the family against me...

FaithFighter : Not having a father is much worse than the situation I am in. As evil as my mom has been to me, and as much as I want to get away from her, I feel that it would be worse if I never knew her at all. I don't deserve your sympathy, you deserve mine.

The thing about my brother is that he won't take a stand. If the police or government do get involved he won't be able to say anything bad about her. He always complains about our mom, but he never fights back and that is why I am her target, because I do. I guess that's what I have to stop though.

tRIUNE : My problem is that I can't stand injustices. If I feel that something is wrong I can't stop myself from fighting it. This is also the reason I get into "trouble" in the debate forums here. My dad keeps telling me that I should just go to the therapist with him and talk to them to satisfy my mom, but I don't want to because in my eyes I am letting the wrongdoer win. I don't need to go to therapy. There is nothing wrong with me. So despite the fact that I know it is the smart thing to do, I don't want to do it. I dunno if that's the same for you or not.

I know you are right. I need to just bite my tongue, sit on my hands and take it, but that is going to be extremely difficult.

tgags123 : Ouch, I feel terrible for you. You should live with your dad, instead. Or, talk to your grandparents, and tell them your mother is the wrong one here. I wish you the best of luck here.

tgags123 :

Yeah. I know how you feel about not giving into wrong doers, I'm the same way. It's why I don't like people posting garbage in the debate forum here. Same thing with my mom from time to time, but that was more of when I was younger.

Just don't do something. .. rash, okay?