Remove Ad, Sign Up
Register to Remove Ad
Register to Remove Ad
Remove Ad, Sign Up
Register to Remove Ad
Register to Remove Ad
Signup for Free!
-More Features-
-Far Less Ads-
About   Users   Help
Users & Guests Online
On Page: 1
Directory: 22
Entire Site: 2 & 594
Page Staff: tgags123, pokemon x, tgags123, supercool22, claytune,
12-28-24 01:39 AM

Forum Links

Related Threads
Coming Soon

Thread Information

Views
724
Replies
5
Rating
2
Status
CLOSED
Thread
Creator
Barathemos
02-21-15 08:45 PM
Last
Post
bigger0gamer
03-15-15 02:40 PM
Additional Thread Details
Views: 300
Today: 0
Users: 1 unique

Thread Actions

Thread Closed
New Thread
New Poll
Order
 

Savior

 

02-21-15 08:45 PM
Barathemos is Offline
| ID: 1139800 | 1088 Words

Barathemos
Level: 207


POSTS: 10697/15639
POST EXP: 669156
LVL EXP: 128711444
CP: 46684.4
VIZ: 909149

Likes: 2  Dislikes: 0
Savior
Chapter One:

"You will become one with the Archis"

Xavier jolted asleep. He glanced over at the clock on his bedside table. It read 2:54 AM. Nights were getting hard for him with all of his nightmares. He needed to get some sleep before tomorrow, one of the most important days of his life. He lay still until he gently fell asleep.

As Xavier woke for the morning, he found it hard to move. His body ached from a hard nights sleep and constant nightmares. Things were hard now a days, it was only him and his sister Natalie living in a small cottage out of town, Neither had a job, only the small $43,000 of inheritance they got from their parents when they died. Not much was to come out of their lives. Xavier wasn't looking for a job as he had been waiting for today, the day he would interview for a job at the Navel base as captain. He had grown up around water, living in Southern Chile near the beach and had begun to love water. He had made his own small raft and would go out of the sea and sail around. However, he had to sell his raft a few months ago for money to help pay for food. Natalie however, was busy looking for a job. She, being 19, had taken over control of the household and had become basically a maid for the house, and did everything with nothing. She was trying to get jobs anywhere she could, offices, restaurants, schools, she was desperate for a job. She hadn't been hired as she had no experience doing anything.

"Get the hell out of bed!" Natalie had yelled across the hallway at Xavier. Obviously last night had been rough for both of them.

Xavier got out of bed and walked out to the main room, where breakfast was waiting for him. Fish. Again, they were having fish. Fish for every meal, but it was something so he had to accept it.

"Why aren't you dressed already?" Natalie yelled at him, frustrated.

"I didn't feel like it..." Xavier answered. It was already 11:15 AM and he needed to be at his interview at 12.

"You only have 45 minutes before you need to be ACROSS TOWN." She answered back.

"I'll try and get there..." Xavier sighed as he quickly ate his food and went back into his room to get dressed. Why am I even trying he asked himself. He wasn't too confident that he would get the job, with no past experience in anything like that. He looked over at his small tablet screen with all of his radars on it. This was just about all that he had left, a small tablet they had been given as a present from their parents 6 years ago. He walked out of the house and said goodbye to Natalie.

As Xavier walked across town slowly, he thought about the kind of things that he might be asked at this interview. He played out all sorts of scenarios in his head. What prior experience do you have? None. Why did you try out for this job? I love water. No, that wouldn't do. I need money. Again, not what would get him the job. I would like to help the Chile Navy. Yes, that was it. He didn't have to tell the truth, he had to get the job. What can you do? I can read radars and I can make split second decisions. What are examples of these split second decisions? I had to live after my parents died with no money. Of course, make the story sappy and make them feel emotionally involved, that was the key.

He saw the base up ahead and got ready. He walked up to the front gate, and said he was there for a job position and they let him in. They said that he was number 4 on the waiting list and it would only be a few minutes. He sat down and waited.

"Number 4 on the waiting list please." Someone said over the intercom. Xavier walked into the room.

"Oh." Was the first thing the commander said as Xavier entered the room. Xavier was wearing shaggy cloths and no shoes, while everyone else was wearing suits so this was understandable.

"Good afternoon sir" Xavier told the man.

"Afternoon." He replied. "Lets gets started shall we?"

"Sure" Xavier relied.

"Why are you here?" This was the first question asked, one Xavier knew the answer to.

"To work for the Chile Navy sir."

"Why do you think you should get the job?" Second question, one Xavier had practiced many times.

"I have experience with the usage of split second decisions and making decisions to benefit those around me sir." Xavier replied.

"Oh do you? Would you care to say an example of one of these decisions?" The commander asked him.

"Yes sir. When my parents died I had to be able to help my entire family and support us through the last 5 years sir." Xavier answered. He saw the commanders eyes drop.

"Well... I'm sorry for your loss... I hope all is well... That is all for the questioning thank you very much." The commander replied. Perfect, Xavier got into his head, just as he had wanted.

He exited the room and went into the waiting room where he chatted with the other people who had already gone into their interviews. Apparently theirs had gone alright, they didn't have much experience either. All that any of them could do was wait for the decision. There were a total of 32 people who tried out for the position, and that took 1:13 minutes total to do. So at 1:45 PM, the intercom turned on.

"We have the results of the interviews." The commander said over the intercom. "The decision was pretty clear of who we were going to pick." We have come forth with a final 10 who we would like to stay for us to chat with alone. Those ten are... A list was read. 9 were read off the list and Xavier didn't hear his name. He was the tenth. As this system works, the top 10 get a job, but only the top gets to be chief commander.

They called Xavier into the office to chat, he was 6th to be talked to.

"Xavier, we have decided that you will be the best fit for commander. Congratulations."

-End of Chapter One-
Savior
Chapter One:

"You will become one with the Archis"

Xavier jolted asleep. He glanced over at the clock on his bedside table. It read 2:54 AM. Nights were getting hard for him with all of his nightmares. He needed to get some sleep before tomorrow, one of the most important days of his life. He lay still until he gently fell asleep.

As Xavier woke for the morning, he found it hard to move. His body ached from a hard nights sleep and constant nightmares. Things were hard now a days, it was only him and his sister Natalie living in a small cottage out of town, Neither had a job, only the small $43,000 of inheritance they got from their parents when they died. Not much was to come out of their lives. Xavier wasn't looking for a job as he had been waiting for today, the day he would interview for a job at the Navel base as captain. He had grown up around water, living in Southern Chile near the beach and had begun to love water. He had made his own small raft and would go out of the sea and sail around. However, he had to sell his raft a few months ago for money to help pay for food. Natalie however, was busy looking for a job. She, being 19, had taken over control of the household and had become basically a maid for the house, and did everything with nothing. She was trying to get jobs anywhere she could, offices, restaurants, schools, she was desperate for a job. She hadn't been hired as she had no experience doing anything.

"Get the hell out of bed!" Natalie had yelled across the hallway at Xavier. Obviously last night had been rough for both of them.

Xavier got out of bed and walked out to the main room, where breakfast was waiting for him. Fish. Again, they were having fish. Fish for every meal, but it was something so he had to accept it.

"Why aren't you dressed already?" Natalie yelled at him, frustrated.

"I didn't feel like it..." Xavier answered. It was already 11:15 AM and he needed to be at his interview at 12.

"You only have 45 minutes before you need to be ACROSS TOWN." She answered back.

"I'll try and get there..." Xavier sighed as he quickly ate his food and went back into his room to get dressed. Why am I even trying he asked himself. He wasn't too confident that he would get the job, with no past experience in anything like that. He looked over at his small tablet screen with all of his radars on it. This was just about all that he had left, a small tablet they had been given as a present from their parents 6 years ago. He walked out of the house and said goodbye to Natalie.

As Xavier walked across town slowly, he thought about the kind of things that he might be asked at this interview. He played out all sorts of scenarios in his head. What prior experience do you have? None. Why did you try out for this job? I love water. No, that wouldn't do. I need money. Again, not what would get him the job. I would like to help the Chile Navy. Yes, that was it. He didn't have to tell the truth, he had to get the job. What can you do? I can read radars and I can make split second decisions. What are examples of these split second decisions? I had to live after my parents died with no money. Of course, make the story sappy and make them feel emotionally involved, that was the key.

He saw the base up ahead and got ready. He walked up to the front gate, and said he was there for a job position and they let him in. They said that he was number 4 on the waiting list and it would only be a few minutes. He sat down and waited.

"Number 4 on the waiting list please." Someone said over the intercom. Xavier walked into the room.

"Oh." Was the first thing the commander said as Xavier entered the room. Xavier was wearing shaggy cloths and no shoes, while everyone else was wearing suits so this was understandable.

"Good afternoon sir" Xavier told the man.

"Afternoon." He replied. "Lets gets started shall we?"

"Sure" Xavier relied.

"Why are you here?" This was the first question asked, one Xavier knew the answer to.

"To work for the Chile Navy sir."

"Why do you think you should get the job?" Second question, one Xavier had practiced many times.

"I have experience with the usage of split second decisions and making decisions to benefit those around me sir." Xavier replied.

"Oh do you? Would you care to say an example of one of these decisions?" The commander asked him.

"Yes sir. When my parents died I had to be able to help my entire family and support us through the last 5 years sir." Xavier answered. He saw the commanders eyes drop.

"Well... I'm sorry for your loss... I hope all is well... That is all for the questioning thank you very much." The commander replied. Perfect, Xavier got into his head, just as he had wanted.

He exited the room and went into the waiting room where he chatted with the other people who had already gone into their interviews. Apparently theirs had gone alright, they didn't have much experience either. All that any of them could do was wait for the decision. There were a total of 32 people who tried out for the position, and that took 1:13 minutes total to do. So at 1:45 PM, the intercom turned on.

"We have the results of the interviews." The commander said over the intercom. "The decision was pretty clear of who we were going to pick." We have come forth with a final 10 who we would like to stay for us to chat with alone. Those ten are... A list was read. 9 were read off the list and Xavier didn't hear his name. He was the tenth. As this system works, the top 10 get a job, but only the top gets to be chief commander.

They called Xavier into the office to chat, he was 6th to be talked to.

"Xavier, we have decided that you will be the best fit for commander. Congratulations."

-End of Chapter One-
Site Staff
Minecraft Admin

Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'

Registered: 02-17-13
Location: Atlanta, Georgia
Last Post: 21 days
Last Active: 2 days

Post Rating: 2   Liked By: bigger0gamer, Pacman+Mariofan,

02-21-15 08:45 PM
Barathemos is Offline
| ID: 1139801 | 13 Words

Barathemos
Level: 207


POSTS: 10698/15639
POST EXP: 669156
LVL EXP: 128711444
CP: 46684.4
VIZ: 909149

Likes: 0  Dislikes: 0
Eniitan :
greenluigi :
mohammedroxx3 :
imamonster :
juuldude :

You guys should all feel free to read/comment.
Eniitan :
greenluigi :
mohammedroxx3 :
imamonster :
juuldude :

You guys should all feel free to read/comment.
Site Staff
Minecraft Admin

Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'

Registered: 02-17-13
Location: Atlanta, Georgia
Last Post: 21 days
Last Active: 2 days

02-22-15 06:13 AM
Eniitan is Offline
| ID: 1139881 | 25 Words

Eniitan
Level: 176


POSTS: 2683/10522
POST EXP: 959649
LVL EXP: 72537076
CP: 55322.9
VIZ: 2623741

Likes: 0  Dislikes: 0
This is a rather unusual story I have read. Not that I have read one before. Its a good one that you have here.
This is a rather unusual story I have read. Not that I have read one before. Its a good one that you have here.
Vizzed Elite
Number 1 Sailor Moon, Final Fantasy And Freedom Planet Fan On Vizzed!


Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'

Registered: 08-16-12
Last Post: 818 days
Last Active: 306 days

02-22-15 08:58 AM
Pacman+Mariofan is Offline
| ID: 1139899 | 42 Words


PacmanandMariofan
Level: 166


POSTS: 4439/9337
POST EXP: 662200
LVL EXP: 60181553
CP: 38428.3
VIZ: 1567578

Likes: 0  Dislikes: 0
This is a pretty interesting story! I hope to see more of this story (so please summon me to the next parts of the story ) and you did a great job at making this detailed! Keep up the neat story-writing!
This is a pretty interesting story! I hope to see more of this story (so please summon me to the next parts of the story ) and you did a great job at making this detailed! Keep up the neat story-writing!
Vizzed Elite
2-Time VCS Winner
Philippians 4:6-7


Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'

Registered: 10-22-12
Location: The Milky Way (not the candy)
Last Post: 1202 days
Last Active: 1202 days

02-24-15 02:39 PM
Hidden Phantom is Offline
| ID: 1140633 | 92 Words

Hidden Phantom
Level: 88


POSTS: 1516/2088
POST EXP: 72365
LVL EXP: 6529397
CP: 4023.2
VIZ: 466064

Likes: 0  Dislikes: 0
Barathemos : I always hate it when I jolt asleep.

Interesting, but a bit rushed.  The title character's interactions with other characters feel odd, there is no energy behind them at all, almost as if he doesn't care to interact with anyone, for his benefit or not (which may be what you are going for, or not).  It just feels kind of awkward.

It also kind of bothers me that the names don't quite match up with the region.

Overall, pretty good, but the second chapter will need a bit more energy to it.
Barathemos : I always hate it when I jolt asleep.

Interesting, but a bit rushed.  The title character's interactions with other characters feel odd, there is no energy behind them at all, almost as if he doesn't care to interact with anyone, for his benefit or not (which may be what you are going for, or not).  It just feels kind of awkward.

It also kind of bothers me that the names don't quite match up with the region.

Overall, pretty good, but the second chapter will need a bit more energy to it.
Trusted Member

The One and Only


Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'

Registered: 03-02-12
Location: Atlanta, GA
Last Post: 736 days
Last Active: 453 days

03-15-15 02:40 PM
bigger0gamer is Offline
| ID: 1147305 | 19 Words

bigger0gamer
Level: 56


POSTS: 407/748
POST EXP: 48359
LVL EXP: 1317023
CP: 3933.6
VIZ: 49222

Likes: 0  Dislikes: 0
So far it's good. Would love to see more. Noe if you don't mind, I'm going to jolt asleep.
So far it's good. Would love to see more. Noe if you don't mind, I'm going to jolt asleep.
Member
Master of Bacon


Affected by 'Laziness Syndrome'

Registered: 08-23-13
Location: The Heart of the Dragon Lands
Last Post: 281 days
Last Active: 77 days

Links

Page Comments


This page has no comments

Adblocker detected!

Vizzed.com is very expensive to keep alive! The Ads pay for the servers.

Vizzed has 3 TB worth of games and 1 TB worth of music.  This site is free to use but the ads barely pay for the monthly server fees.  If too many more people use ad block, the site cannot survive.

We prioritize the community over the site profits.  This is why we avoid using annoying (but high paying) ads like most other sites which include popups, obnoxious sounds and animations, malware, and other forms of intrusiveness.  We'll do our part to never resort to these types of ads, please do your part by helping support this site by adding Vizzed.com to your ad blocking whitelist.

×