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Friend turns into bully
05-14-15 04:46 PM
LCRain is Offline
| ID: 1168013 | 189 Words
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So there has been this guy I made friends with in october from the day program I go to. He's been a real help when I was going through my problems. He was always there to lend a hand in one way or another. Suddenly though when he moved into the same housing program as I he has turned into a bully towards me. Every time I open my mouth up he makes fun of me. He is turning everyone else against me and just saying I can't take a joke. But two months ago I was always joking around with him and the friends we share there was never problems. So I know he's going through problems himself and one side of me tells me to just give him space and maybe he'll go back to being that friend you liked to hang out with. Another side though says for me to drop him like a rock and move on. My anxiety and depression don't make this situation any better.... Ok two questions for all of you! What should I do? Also has this ever happened to you? So I know he's going through problems himself and one side of me tells me to just give him space and maybe he'll go back to being that friend you liked to hang out with. Another side though says for me to drop him like a rock and move on. My anxiety and depression don't make this situation any better.... Ok two questions for all of you! What should I do? Also has this ever happened to you? |
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05-14-15 05:07 PM
Boured is Offline
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LCRain : I think I figured out the reason though I am not sure if it is the correct one but I will say it anyway. There are many ways that would lead a friend to do this to another friend such as not wanting to be made fun of himself, Being like all bullies and doing it to feel good about themselves because they have low self esteem. Since there are so many reasons and the fact that I do not know you or him well enough to tell which is which so I cannot help you with that. My advice would be to try your first plan to give him space and maybe he may figure it out for himself that this is not a good thing to do and perhaps he will stop. If he continues to do it after this then you should just try to forget about him. Friends change as life goes on some of your nice friends may change into jerks and sometimes you just drift apart not finding anything in common anymore. It is very sad to let a friend go but if he keeps doing this to you it's just going to get worse and the only way besides him stopping is to stop it yourself by not being his "friend" anymore I hope that he will eventually stop but he may not just do what you think is right because in the end it is your choice whether you should try to get him to stop or just leave him altogether. I hope I was some help and if I wasn't then I'm sorry I wasted your time  -Boured- I hope I was some help and if I wasn't then I'm sorry I wasted your time -Boured- |
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05-14-15 05:20 PM
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05-14-15 06:04 PM
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Honestly yes. This has happened to me several times. Sometimes the other person is just joking but sometimes they are actually being quite rude and mean to me. It could possibly be that he has been through so much as have you and he just cracks every time he talks to you. Sometimes putting two people together that have experienced hard ships may cause drama and or somebody joking with the other one or being mean to them way to much. If I was you I would just ignore the person as much as possible. If he kept on I would cut him out of my life. I know that sounds a bit drastic but it would save you quite a bit of more emotional trauma. I had to find out the hard way.. always letting people run over me and treat me like I was just a pathetic worthless nothing.. they even said I was those things. I know none of that is true though and they were all just jealous of me. You can also try to talk to him a bit and tell him how you feel .. but not in a crowded room where others can hear because that can lead to him probably saying or doing something worse. Just hang in there LC.. I know it's rough now but eventually everything has a way of working out. It just takes a lot of time and patience.. Love ya.. you know if you ever need me I am a pm away. If I was you I would just ignore the person as much as possible. If he kept on I would cut him out of my life. I know that sounds a bit drastic but it would save you quite a bit of more emotional trauma. I had to find out the hard way.. always letting people run over me and treat me like I was just a pathetic worthless nothing.. they even said I was those things. I know none of that is true though and they were all just jealous of me. You can also try to talk to him a bit and tell him how you feel .. but not in a crowded room where others can hear because that can lead to him probably saying or doing something worse. Just hang in there LC.. I know it's rough now but eventually everything has a way of working out. It just takes a lot of time and patience.. Love ya.. you know if you ever need me I am a pm away. |
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05-15-15 08:44 AM
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Madara Uchiha: so let me get this straight, you had a friend who always been there for you and never let you down, you and this guy always get along very well but over time he started to act like a jerk and will bother you and goes against you in every ways, like making fun of you and so on and you started to believe you should drop him but the other side said to not, you have a really minor problem. :l Well I can help you to solve it, in the hope that people will start to calling me by name as Madara Uchiha, okay you should do both but at different time, you see people turn to jerk when they want to feel strong not wanting other to bully them but at the same time not want to fight some one stronger or will tell on them, to mixed these two will make people think you are a fool who bully just about anyone without thinking, so am guessing that your friend might just want to be in the top or middle of the whatever rank, lower is to be simple tower by the strong, so he want to be the strong but he doesn't want a fight, so he chose you knowing you two are bugs you won't fight back and to make sure you don't tell on him he said it a joke, it always a joke to jerk. my suggest is to put him in his place, make him feel that you are not a push over and that you will not endure his 'joke' not by fight but by a simple warning and the next day if he do it again end your friendships, then you are free to report or what ever, giving him space with only make him think you are scare of him making him do more 'joke', follow my advise it the best, but then again I really don't care, it your life and I won't control it you get what I means, you get some you lose some, it not my problem or my joy, do what it is best. now I would like some lone time.....later (warp out) :l (I am Madara Uchiha) Madara Uchiha: so let me get this straight, you had a friend who always been there for you and never let you down, you and this guy always get along very well but over time he started to act like a jerk and will bother you and goes against you in every ways, like making fun of you and so on and you started to believe you should drop him but the other side said to not, you have a really minor problem. :l Well I can help you to solve it, in the hope that people will start to calling me by name as Madara Uchiha, okay you should do both but at different time, you see people turn to jerk when they want to feel strong not wanting other to bully them but at the same time not want to fight some one stronger or will tell on them, to mixed these two will make people think you are a fool who bully just about anyone without thinking, so am guessing that your friend might just want to be in the top or middle of the whatever rank, lower is to be simple tower by the strong, so he want to be the strong but he doesn't want a fight, so he chose you knowing you two are bugs you won't fight back and to make sure you don't tell on him he said it a joke, it always a joke to jerk. my suggest is to put him in his place, make him feel that you are not a push over and that you will not endure his 'joke' not by fight but by a simple warning and the next day if he do it again end your friendships, then you are free to report or what ever, giving him space with only make him think you are scare of him making him do more 'joke', follow my advise it the best, but then again I really don't care, it your life and I won't control it you get what I means, you get some you lose some, it not my problem or my joy, do what it is best. now I would like some lone time.....later (warp out) :l (I am Madara Uchiha) |
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05-17-15 05:33 AM
LCRain is Offline
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Thanks for the advice everyone! So an So an |
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05-28-15 02:39 PM
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Yeah, I would think a balance being understanding to his problems, but not letting yourself be abused is important. Had you every confronted him about the fact that he's bullying you. He might be doing it more out of a reflex, and not realizing what's happening. If you tell him you considered him a good friend and understands he's going through hard stuff, but find it hard when he's rude to you, he may open right up to you again and realize what he's doing wrong. I think he will likely often revert back to a "bully state", so make sure you are prepared for that if this friendship is to continue. And also, based on the fact that he does sound like bad trouble, make sure you're always safe, and don't get sucked in with anything dangerous or wrong he might be doing. Had you every confronted him about the fact that he's bullying you. He might be doing it more out of a reflex, and not realizing what's happening. If you tell him you considered him a good friend and understands he's going through hard stuff, but find it hard when he's rude to you, he may open right up to you again and realize what he's doing wrong. I think he will likely often revert back to a "bully state", so make sure you are prepared for that if this friendship is to continue. And also, based on the fact that he does sound like bad trouble, make sure you're always safe, and don't get sucked in with anything dangerous or wrong he might be doing. |
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05-28-15 08:32 PM
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Thank's for the |
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08-02-15 11:10 PM
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Yeah most of my friends became bullies idk why i guess just for fun or an act of popularity idk screw em hopefully they fall off a cliff |
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09-12-15 06:17 PM
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LCRain : My best bet is that he has something going on at home thats stressing him out to the point were he takes it all out on you, he could also jumped into a bad crowd and thinks he dosnt need you anymore,if I were you I'd drop him from your life,he may ask you to stay his friend due to the fact that he wont realize that your so important to him until you leave,even then I wouldnt give him much of a chance there are much better people in the world and a friend that turns into a bully is no friend. |
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10-14-15 10:39 AM
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Just stop associating with him. I realize that it may stress you out or cause you pain but you don't need someone abusing you. |
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