So much has been going on with me lately that I've actually had to go on Vizzed to relieve my stress and not have a burnout. Even though I was supposed to be inactive
Sorry if it seems like I'm usually lying about my inactivity to get attention.
I'm not doing these threads about my life for attention either. Also, when I make these kinds of threads, I'm not just doing it for myself. People like to hear about my life so I tell them.
Over the last couple months, I was awesome on the outside, but there was darkness in my mind. I always felt like there was a lot missing in my life and I really missed hanging out with my best friend. I was always telling people that things were OK, but things did not feel like they were OK.
After a lot of thinking and trying to believe, I determined that I now believe in God, but I'm struggling to believe everything I've heard from the sermons I've heard. Most things I do, but some things I still feel like I'll never be able to believe. I'll try until I do, because my family and I are anxious for me to finally get baptized and truly be a Christ follower for the first time. So yes, there was something missing in my life. But I was an Atheist for a couple years so I didn't believe there was a God and I felt I wasn't missing anything.
I have the bravery to be outgoing now, I just choose not to a lot of the time because most people I can talk to are the people I shouldn't be talking to. I found out that I can talk to my best friend at school again without interrupting a conversation she's having with someone else. My life has a lot more action now. All I need is God and then my life will feel complete again for the first time in several years!
That's not even close to all that happened to me lately. Last week, my best friend invited me to her birthday party. I asked
Vizzed for advice since I wasn't sure of everything I should do. I received plenty of advice, and then last night, it was time for the party.
The party was held at my local skating rink. There wasn't a lot of people there, even for the regular roller skating. There were like 8 people that showed up for the birthday party. It was mostly girls like I expected. That night I confirmed that talking to girls is now almost equally easy for me as talking to guys, and that I definitely prefer talking to/hanging out with girls.
The party started out with some guy I know coming up to me and asking the birthday girl "Why is
he here?!" I was thinking, "Oh crud. I'll handle this." XD But others handled it for me before I could, and since then that guy was nice to me. XD
I didn't do too bad with the skating. The first couple attempts I couldn't even do it right and I kept falling. Multiple people helped me do it right, and after that, I was fine by myself, eventually even without wall support.
We had pizza, pop, and cake, so I expected the party to go much more nuts real soon, but it didn't. Thank goodness it didn't, because if it did I would've kept slipping on my skates and falling from laughing XD I was socializing with everyone there that I could except for my friend's little sister who I never got around to talking to even though I'm good with most types of kids
Everyone enjoyed having me there, and that party was a huge chance for me to redeem myself. In 7th grade, I was nice but very immature and shy, and 2 people there knew me from back then. I was afraid one of the people there wouldn't talk to me because of it, but I was wrong. We talked a lot and now she knows I've made extreme changes in the last 2 years. The other person knows my new personality too. Now I can stop worrying about people thinking I'm like how I was before!
People seemed determined to make the birthday girl cry with joy last night, so I braced myself when she opened my gift bag. I bought her a really sweet card, a bag of pretzels, and a bag of chocolate pretzels. XD Her reaction from the card was awesome enough, but I laughed hard at her reaction to the pretzelmania. She looked shocked and yelled, "I
love pretzels!!!" XD
I was very happy to be skating until I reached my limit. I fell down and felt like I sprained my wrists, and my arms hurt so bad as well. I already hurt myself pretty bad in other places before that. So if I fell again, I was almost stuck there. I announced to the party people that I couldn't skate anymore, so I went to my table and sat there for about an hour until my mom came. The birthday girl and I both felt really bad, and for the next hour I sat there alone most of the time. I got pain medication, got a hug from the birthday girl for the 2nd or 3rd time that night, and then I left.
I had already volunteered to help out at a school event this morning at 8:00, so I did things to cheer myself up and then I went to bed pretty late. I got to reunite with a lot of JROTC students again, which I missed so badly because I don't have that life-changing class until February or March. D= Also, some friends of mine were there. The event's called "Santa's Breakfast" and it was for little kids to eat breakfast and see Santa and his elves. I got to wipe a washcloth across trays for over an hour!
That event was almost as fun as the party last night, and afterward I thanked my friend for inviting me to her party.
Basically, I had a fun time at parties, redeemed myself, got to hang out with my best friend more, and learned how to skate, which I want to do more now.
I don't make these
update threads so much longer than they need to be for selfish reasons. I do it because people enjoy seeing my detailed, funny, inspiring stories instead of just the basics, and it allows people to know me more.
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