I went to the store with my mom today. Normal thing, went so I could help her carry bags. The grocery store had gotten in some of those little transparent click-fan things; you know, the little personal fans that run off of batteries and that you hold a button down to use? These lit up, though, and they did different blinky lights that leave trails behind them when you wave them a bit. So, while Mom was debating over different meat cuts, I was playing with them and having fun leaving light trails and 'drawing' in the air. I didn't think anything of it, I do stuff like that all the time because it's fun and I'm not hurting anyone or anything, right? 

Some ladies walked behind me while I was doing this and laughing (quietly, mind you, I know better than to be loud in a public place and if I'm not panicking it's easy to not be loud),  and one of them went  "Oh that poor dear, to be so simple-minded. Her poor family, it must be so hard for them to keep her." REALLY loudly.  The other lady agreed and said something about how sad it must be for me to exist, if I'm that child-like when I'm not a child. 

I was the only one in the aisle besides  those two, so I know they were talking about me. They were acting like there was no way I could hear them, either, despite the GLARINGLY LARGE hearing aids sitting on my ears over top of the arms of my glasses.  I wish I'd confronted them now, said something about how I could hear them just fine, and wasn't it rude to talk about people like that...but at the time it shocked me enough that I just stood there until they'd gone on.

It hurts when people say things like that. It really does. I know I'm not the smartest person out there, but I'm not 'simple-minded', and I don't think it's too hard for my family to help me take care of myself? I don't think. No one has ever said anything to me about it, anyway. It's not sad for me to exist, either. I like existing most of the time. But hearing things like that REALLY hurt me.

Is it bad that I enjoy things kids like? Is it so awful that I like having fun, and sometimes having fun means something as simple as playing with stuff like that in the grocery store for a few minutes? My parents have never said I shouldn't do it, all I've ever been told is to not bother others, and that's held true since I was a kid. Why is it so different now that I'm over the age of 12? I don't understand why things like that make adults look at me like I'm either stupid or something to be pitied. I'm just having fun. No kids have ever treated me like that, so why do the adults?

I don't know the age of these women, but I think for the most part it's them being used to an older generation, when people above the age of 12 had to grow up much sooner. That isn't the case anymore. I'm almost 30 and I spend a good portion of my day in pajamas, think puns are hilarious, and will say "echo, echo, echo" into any room I enter that echoes. Whatever, that's me. Something I think might help with your situation is realizing that those women didn't know you, and past that small interaction, probably haven't thought about your "immaturity" since. Also remember that you weren't bothering anyone, you were being quiet. They were the inconsiderate ones who talked loudly about you in a way you could hear

Yunimori : Don't worry. To be honest, those old ladies seem upset that they are stuck with no hobbies, and no friends other than those people they'll gossip with. Also remember, the generation they are from, was pretty lame. No fun after the age of twelve, even then, their fun was very limited. Next time, just confront them. Show them that you don't appreciate being treated like that. 

SilverHyruler : First of all, thank you for have having Darude's Sandstorm on your post. Ever since I first heard that song on the radio, I thought it was the coolest ever.

The track you got is the audio from the video, of course. Hence, the barking of the dog. A little too harsh a noise for radio but I think the video came after its initial release anyway.

It's not so easy to just confront people bold as brass. It can be a little intimidating to just walk up to people and tell them they are wrong; a bit like impinging on a barking dog's territory.


ender44 : Yeah. They were gossiping like little children where offended parties could hear them. Good of you to point that out.

You are also so right to say that they didn't know her and couldn't accurately assess her maturity based on a small behavioral quirk that surprisingly a lot of adults have. That quirk is called, "I like to have fun and I don't care who watches and judges me." The quirk was long thought indigenous to children, thus the older ladies' confusion.


Yunimori : It is not bad at all to like what kids like. The egos of children are underdeveloped which means they are truer to the innermost part of their psyche than we are. If your ego develops to the point where you are the one concerned with meat cuts and can't spare a few moments to play, then your true identity has become lost to your conscious mind. Do not be in any rush to mature yourself. Be who you really are. You are original. You cannot be replaced. The awful thing would really be forgetting how to have fun in everyday life.

The gossipers treat you differently than a twelve year old because they saw with their failing eyesight an easy target to while away their own insecurities under the pretense of a nice light chat. That's all it is. Ordinarily logical people are given to bouts of "disability racism". They see hearing aids and think "she can't hear", even though the mere presence of hearing aids would mean the opposite would be true. They are the confused ones.

You're probably not being treated differently now than when you were twelve. The difference is that you are now acutely aware of what people are saying. When we are 12, we don't give a second thought to the words adults speak behind their hands. My awareness of things adults are privy to didn't perk up until age 13 and a half. I entered my eighth grade at Junior High and suddenly had an awareness that girls are sexy and I needed to wear looser pants. That had been waiting for me just below the surface my entire life up to that point; my preference for female company, my need for them to like me and desire to impress them. It all made sense. That was also the year my mother first told me to get a job. I could not handle all this new adult information all at once. I exploded! ~the end

P3

Postman3 : Your welcome for the Darude Sandstorm. I also guess I get why you wouldn't want to confront random strangers. I didn't think of that, because I'm the kind of guy who kicks hornets nests to see how bad they sting. It's just the way I am I guess. Also, I don't get why an old lady would (childishly) gossip about how childish someone is because they are having fun? Kind of hypocritical..

Nope, it isn't "bad" at all that you enjoy things like that sometimes. If we're honest I think we all enjoy some "childish" things, and the only reason we don't embrace our inner kid more often is because we try to be "proper" in front of others.

I tried that for a while...it was boring.

Almost everything I watch on television is a cartoon. Seriously, I watch one show that isn't a cartoon, and it's a Disney channel show. xD My favorite movie is A Goofy Movie, and I love the Disney fairy movies (Tinkerbell and the great fairy rescue for example). I still think Video Game themed clothing is awesome. I still enjoy chasing bubbles. I still talk in funny voices to amuse myself when I answer the phone, or even when I'm by myself sometimes.

My point? One can be adult, or "mature" without being boring or forcing themselves to stop doing things they enjoy because they seem childish. Do you have fun playing with Legos? Then do it! Life is short, so get the important stuff done and then have fun doing whatever silly things amuse you!

These ladies probably just jumped to conclusions because they fell victim to BoringAdultItis like so many other unfortunate souls. We should count ourselves lucky to have escaped that, Yuni. Or they may have been attempting to shame you because...well, you were having fun and adults just don't do that! They have to be miserable and boring old creatures. Heh, yeah...guess someone failed to inform us of that, didn't they?

Now if you'll excuse me, I see a ball pit that needs jumping in.

Since I can't get summons to work again, I'm just going to hope people see this.

Thanks, everyone, for the kind comments and the encouragement. This mess got me down, but you guys helped perk me back up. Really, thank you, and thanks for the bits of insight.

I will say that I don't think I could have just walked up and confronted them, even though I still wish I had. The thought is scary beyond words, but thanks for backing me up, guys.  I'll try not to let stuff like this make me upset again, and keep your words in my mind so that I won't. I hear things like that all too often and I have yet to grow a thick enough skin to not let it bother me. But I'll keep trying.

That's a ridiculous story... thanks for sharing it.

You really shouldn't think anything of them... they just made some wrong assumptions. They saw your hearing aids (which for some reason they associated with mental disorders), and that you were playing with a light (which, I think we've all done at some point in our adult life), and assumed you were "simple-minded". What a stupid jump! But whatever, we all get caught doing something silly sometimes... and you know what? It's silly people who make the best friends, and lighten up the world. It's silly people who are happy and make others happy.

I'm silly (yes, it's hard to believe) and I wish silliness upon everyone. Those ladies just made a really bad judgment call, you just keep on having fun.

Yunimori : No, it's not bad, not at all. You have the right to like anything you like, and others must tolerate that. I, as a 13 year old, still enjoy kids show, like Noddy, for example. I don't see the point on why people make fun of others just because they still enjoy kid things. Those ladies were very mean, I'm sure of it, and you should simply ignore them. Don't let anyone bring you down, as you're free to like anything!

To be perfectly honest, I usually just ignore those kind of people because honestly, I'm the kind of guy that doesn't give a crap about what other people think of my personality or what I do.. Those kind of people are just a bunch of jerks who don't deserve your attention. I say that you're fine the way you are and there's no reason to let something that a couple of jerks think about you effect you in such a negative way. You are who you are and that's all that matters, just be yourself.

Bad? The day doing kids' stuff are to be avoided because it's not "of your age" is the day you ARE old.

Mind you, there may be times when doing it might be inappropriate or when it's advised not to do it. I would generally advise against it in department stores unless you are in a toy section - it might look like you are "testing" the products. 

But otherwise, just act as you wish! You will of course find people around you judging - I've had my fair share in my life, although not as bad as you report. Just ignore them... unless "everyone" starts talking. Then you might want to reconsider.

Listen to what I'm saying. Don't let anyone bring you down based on who you are. You are your own person, and you can do what you like. If other people can't accept that, then it's their loss, because you are one of the most amazing people I have ever met. I used to get sad a lot when people make fun of me real easily, but thanks to this wonderful site, I can take it now. If someone says something about you, it's your decision on what to do with the situation. I recommend to just ignore them and move on as if nothing happened. But, it's your choice. Just try not to think too much about it and it'll all pass as if nothing happened.

LunarDarkness2 : Here, here! However, there *might* come a time where "everyone" saying negative things about how you act might become a point where you should rethink a little. Of course, it's on a case-by-case basis.

For example, EVERYONE (literally) was mocking by facial hair when I was 13-14... and I do admit it was ugly so I shaved it. But people mocking me because of my "utopic" political opinions (I'm borderline anarchist) is NOT something I will pay attention to. From what I've read and seen in real life, my worldview seems to be the best one.

Yunimori : No, it isn't bad that you enjoy things kids like at all. I know this is probably going to sound cheesy, but you should be able to do whatever you want as long as you aren't hurting anyone in anyway. If I saw those fans I would have started playing with them too, just so you know . It wasn't your fault they thought you were so simple-minded, if anything, you should feel bad for them because they probably didn't have a very fun childhood, at least that's my assumption. Trust me though, there is nothing wrong with what you did, the problem was them. I hope this encounter doesn't change who you are because you shouldn't have to change who you are because of others. I really hope I helped, peace .