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How should kids be disciplined?

 

01-11-16 10:24 PM
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Have to go with the first few posts by Swordlegion here. My father and are very close, but I was spanked as a child. Not traumatic.
Have to go with the first few posts by Swordlegion here. My father and are very close, but I was spanked as a child. Not traumatic.
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01-15-16 08:38 PM
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No violence of any kind. If you have to resort to that you have already lost and you have no real authority. You are just a sadistic bastard.

Kids need rules and boundaries. Don't get me wrong. But beating them is just plain wrong and a totally wrong approach in raising a kid. Once you see no other option then you have already failed as a parent. Your disappointment should be good enough. If they don't fear and respect that then tough luck. You are not doing it right.
No violence of any kind. If you have to resort to that you have already lost and you have no real authority. You are just a sadistic bastard.

Kids need rules and boundaries. Don't get me wrong. But beating them is just plain wrong and a totally wrong approach in raising a kid. Once you see no other option then you have already failed as a parent. Your disappointment should be good enough. If they don't fear and respect that then tough luck. You are not doing it right.
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01-15-16 08:49 PM
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Well,it depends on the offense. For example,when I was a kid and I was smacking my brother around or being a jerk,the usual punishment was grounded for a week,no tv or games. My parents never really got physical,but I knew that was always an option. Now physical punishment should be held as a last option and then only done to correct the child and then explain to them why you had to do it. But trust me,kids are smarter than you think,they will know the right answers to say. Be warned of that.
Well,it depends on the offense. For example,when I was a kid and I was smacking my brother around or being a jerk,the usual punishment was grounded for a week,no tv or games. My parents never really got physical,but I knew that was always an option. Now physical punishment should be held as a last option and then only done to correct the child and then explain to them why you had to do it. But trust me,kids are smarter than you think,they will know the right answers to say. Be warned of that.
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01-15-16 11:53 PM
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I agree with Brigand. Physical punishment is definitely not the right way to parent. If you can't get your kids to comply with what you expect then you likely need to go about it in a different way.

To be fair, there is a small window where a light spank on the butt has been effective in my experience. When kids are under 3 there is little else that can teach them that something is bad other than that. I'm not sure how effective it truly was but it got the desire behavior. However, I can't remember the last time I used any physical punishment on my older girls. Once a kid can communicate the physical punishment should be out the window.



I do have to say though - anyone who doesn't have kids simply doesn't understand what it is like. Obviously anyone who plans to have kids should think about these things and be prepared for the inevitable of trying to raise kids. It's tough. You're not always your best self with your kids.
I agree with Brigand. Physical punishment is definitely not the right way to parent. If you can't get your kids to comply with what you expect then you likely need to go about it in a different way.

To be fair, there is a small window where a light spank on the butt has been effective in my experience. When kids are under 3 there is little else that can teach them that something is bad other than that. I'm not sure how effective it truly was but it got the desire behavior. However, I can't remember the last time I used any physical punishment on my older girls. Once a kid can communicate the physical punishment should be out the window.



I do have to say though - anyone who doesn't have kids simply doesn't understand what it is like. Obviously anyone who plans to have kids should think about these things and be prepared for the inevitable of trying to raise kids. It's tough. You're not always your best self with your kids.
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04-08-16 11:46 PM
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I would say communication is the key, sounds cliche but my mom doesn't beat me, instead she yells at me like there's no tomorrow, like whenever I am on my computer, she just throws a fit that I don't let her see what I'm seeing and takes it away, I'm probably exaggerating but honestly this has scarred me and I am just an anxious mess, that's why I don't like to let people borrow my computer, 
I would say communication is the key, sounds cliche but my mom doesn't beat me, instead she yells at me like there's no tomorrow, like whenever I am on my computer, she just throws a fit that I don't let her see what I'm seeing and takes it away, I'm probably exaggerating but honestly this has scarred me and I am just an anxious mess, that's why I don't like to let people borrow my computer, 
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04-09-16 08:18 AM
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I'm a very strong proponent of a non physical approach. Here in Sweden it is actually illegal to hit your child so it's not like it matters much unless I move out of the country. Besides pretty much ever study ever done speaking for physical punishment being ineffective compared to other methods, it brings a host of problems.

Since a child is still developing they may often times not see why what they did is wrong. Hitting them is only going to make them stop out of fear and sever their relationship with their parents rather than deal with the underlying problem of understanding why it's wrong. It is also going to teach them that violence is the way to deal with problems. Regularly using physical punishment also poses the very real risk of a parent losing control and becoming abusive which is something I think should be avoided at all costs. So really I'm of the belief that if you need to resort to violence to discipline your child every time they do something then you need to reevulate your approach or you're not fit to be a parent.

Sure you could argue something along the lines of "my parents hit me and I turned out fine" but even if that is the case it does not make it the best option. You don't really know how things would've turned out if they didn't.
I'm a very strong proponent of a non physical approach. Here in Sweden it is actually illegal to hit your child so it's not like it matters much unless I move out of the country. Besides pretty much ever study ever done speaking for physical punishment being ineffective compared to other methods, it brings a host of problems.

Since a child is still developing they may often times not see why what they did is wrong. Hitting them is only going to make them stop out of fear and sever their relationship with their parents rather than deal with the underlying problem of understanding why it's wrong. It is also going to teach them that violence is the way to deal with problems. Regularly using physical punishment also poses the very real risk of a parent losing control and becoming abusive which is something I think should be avoided at all costs. So really I'm of the belief that if you need to resort to violence to discipline your child every time they do something then you need to reevulate your approach or you're not fit to be a parent.

Sure you could argue something along the lines of "my parents hit me and I turned out fine" but even if that is the case it does not make it the best option. You don't really know how things would've turned out if they didn't.
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04-09-16 01:56 PM
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Sadly nowz and dayz I see that people can't discipline their obnoxious children out in public anymore because some goody jerk off will callz the cops on them

I sayz if the child needz to be smacked across their butt then the parent should be allowed to do it and if the parents feelz the kid needs a soft bop on the mouth and a firm yelling at then they need to be allowed to do that without the fear of some a*s hole calling child protective services on them just because they were trying to correct their brats bad behavior before they consider it ok to misbehave out in public and then they are out of control later in life!

and then there are the dumb parents that won't discipline the rude child because they feel 'he/she is just being a kid' ... *growlz in anger* no they aren't! if that outburst your annoying child just did disturbed me then obviously it isn't ok and you need to tellz it not to do that in public!

granted the above ways of discipline aren't sever if it does make the child feelz negative afterward and they are old enough to understand the words that are said to them then once out in the car talk to the kid and say to them whyz they got spanked for what ever it was they did wrong and that they can avoid getting spanked again if they promise not to do what ever it was ever again ... I knowz it is a sad comparison but it is sorta true kids are similar to dogs they want to please their parents and make them happyz so to knowz they did something wrong and made their parents angry at them makes them feelz bad and if you tellz them don't to do what upset you again then they'll listen and try not to do it again since they want you to be happyz with them
Sadly nowz and dayz I see that people can't discipline their obnoxious children out in public anymore because some goody jerk off will callz the cops on them

I sayz if the child needz to be smacked across their butt then the parent should be allowed to do it and if the parents feelz the kid needs a soft bop on the mouth and a firm yelling at then they need to be allowed to do that without the fear of some a*s hole calling child protective services on them just because they were trying to correct their brats bad behavior before they consider it ok to misbehave out in public and then they are out of control later in life!

and then there are the dumb parents that won't discipline the rude child because they feel 'he/she is just being a kid' ... *growlz in anger* no they aren't! if that outburst your annoying child just did disturbed me then obviously it isn't ok and you need to tellz it not to do that in public!

granted the above ways of discipline aren't sever if it does make the child feelz negative afterward and they are old enough to understand the words that are said to them then once out in the car talk to the kid and say to them whyz they got spanked for what ever it was they did wrong and that they can avoid getting spanked again if they promise not to do what ever it was ever again ... I knowz it is a sad comparison but it is sorta true kids are similar to dogs they want to please their parents and make them happyz so to knowz they did something wrong and made their parents angry at them makes them feelz bad and if you tellz them don't to do what upset you again then they'll listen and try not to do it again since they want you to be happyz with them
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04-10-16 06:56 PM
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Personally I believe that you shouldn't have to physically discipline a child unless they force your upper hand that is. The best way to discipline a child is through chores or squatting for hours if that's how you discipline a child I can almost guarantee that they won't act up again because this kind of punishment gets pretty old for the child after a while.
Personally I believe that you shouldn't have to physically discipline a child unless they force your upper hand that is. The best way to discipline a child is through chores or squatting for hours if that's how you discipline a child I can almost guarantee that they won't act up again because this kind of punishment gets pretty old for the child after a while.
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04-10-16 07:04 PM
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I would probably want to be beaten, as it literally beats it into your skull.

Also another fun punishment is If they are grounded from their phone, don't take the phone but instead the charger. Now them watch as they use it less and less trying to save as much power as possible.....so wonderful.
I would probably want to be beaten, as it literally beats it into your skull.

Also another fun punishment is If they are grounded from their phone, don't take the phone but instead the charger. Now them watch as they use it less and less trying to save as much power as possible.....so wonderful.
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