I love my mom and step-dad, they were the only people that's been there with me through the good and bad, I've lost everybody else but them. My grandmother doesn't even notice me since I'm the second boy. Without them, I'd probably be dead or in a gang...

My parents are not together but I love both of them, but I love my Mom since I have been living with her all my life  and unlike some irresponsible parents that doesn't look after their youngsters  or discipline them, my Mom does actually look after me and I am 25 and she still does look after me especially because I'm immature LOL, I'm 25 so that means she can't discipline me !! So yeah I love my Mom more than my dad, but I do love my dad as well, we have laughs together when I visit him!!

I am surprised at all the people who I used to know that simply did not like their parents. I, on the other hand loved them and would have wanted to stay with them for at least 60 years or more.

Well I love my parents but I also very much dislike my father. My mother has always been great to me.. took care of me .. when I was crying she would make me feel better and she was always there for me. My parents split up when I was about 7 years old and it was hard.. I remember plates breaking and fighting going on all the time when they were still together. I remember one night my brother took me and my sister to another room and told us it was going to be okay and I remember falling asleep to the sound of his voice. Once me and my mom and sisters were on our own things got better. A lot of things happened for me I grew up and changed a lot.. My mom met my step dad when I was 8 and they were married and we moved to another state which was his home state of Nebraska. I never liked my step dad when I was younger but now that he left us .. I miss him.. he kept me in line even when I wasn't able to stay in line and was there for me.. My dad has never really been there for me because of his alcoholism.  He always brought my brother down when he was growing up now my brother has nothing to do with him.. doesn't speak with him and doesn't like talking about him period.. My brother came down to visit us earlier this Christmas and I mentioned something about dad and he said Dad?? like what are you talking about. He's been through a lot.. and I understand why he has nothing to do with my dad now. I started living with my dad in 8th grade and things were okay at first besides him drinking all the time. He didn't go off on me as much and helped me with my homework a lot until one night when I had a terrible day at school .. I was being bullied and when I came home I was crying and upset because of how horrible my day was. Whiskey is my dads abusive type of alcohol and he drank tons of it .. that night. He got fed up with me crying I guess and started screaming at me in my face... he cussed me called me so many names.. names nobody has ever called me.. told me how worthless I was and made me feel like a nobody.. he was building me my own room onto the back of the house and the next thing I know he takes me and says follow me and takes me behind the house and says look at this.. look what I am building you.. you worthless girl.. calling me all the cuss words you could imagine some of which nobody could think there dad would call their daughter. He treated me horrible.. and I ran crying terribly up to my grandmas... I called my mother and told her what he had done.. my mom was still with my step dad at the time and they said they were going to bring the cops I said DON'T because my dad hates cops and he would go off like crazy if they brought cops down there and he had a gun out messing around with it to.. which made it worse. My step dad and mom came to get me down the drive way and my step dad had brought his gun with him.. just in case... the cop was up the road waiting.. thank goodness because my dad would of went crazy... probably shot somebody and ended up in jail.  I got all of my belongings and put them in my car we had at the time... I still think they hid some of my stuff because .. there was a lot of stuff that I couldn't find and till this day are missing. A lot of time has passed now and my dad made a comment one time.. Laura is good when she wants to be... I was disgusted.. and honestly if I want to act a certain sort of way I will... I try to be civil with him ...now and talk with him.. I still tell him I love him because I do.. I mean it happened  4 years ago at least ... I just can't seem to get over how violent he was... there was also one time he pointed a gun to my step moms head it was horrible... he gets so violent when he gets his hands on whiskey it is terrible. Lately my dad has been acting really weird.. it seems.. like for instance child support for me was cut off when I turned 18.. and he gave my mom another month of it with no complaint... he acts really happy to... my step mom is different and she has a lot of health problems but her and my dad have split up several times and now they are back together... or have been for a while.. I can't figure him out right now it seems.. he is being so nice.. he even agreed to give me some money for my phone card since it was for my birthday anyways.. keep in mind he has missed several of my birthdays and Christmas's and has not called one bit... then this past 2013 he gives me birthday money... last night we had to go to my grandmas and we ate a big meal turkey.. dressing and different stuff with my dad and step mom.. and my mom even came.. they got us each a gift even my mom got a gift.. it is just awkward for me sense they were really awkward about our other Christmas's... I guess my dad's side of the family is different in general and I wish I could figure out most of the reasons.. I guess it's because most of them are Bipolar... but never were diagnosed with it because they didn't want to admit it. My dad has been really being kind to me.. saying I love you and talking more to me.. but I don't know what to take of it.. I just am kind back and tell him I love him to.. because I do love him.. even through all of the things that he has done.
My mom has tried to explain to me that he is going through a dry spell with his drinking right now and that is the reason he is acting human to all of us.  It is most likely a matter of time before he falls off the wagon and starts drinking again.  Its nice though in the meantime to have him be somewhat civil and nice to us.  Its ironic that one of the main mottos of alcoholics anonymous is One Day At A Time and even though I am not an alcoholic but a child of an alcoholic that is exactly how I have to live my life... One Day At A Time.  Something that I have considered checking in to and they even have a site online is Alateen.. a group that helps support children of alcoholics.  That is definitely something I might check into..  My siblings might benefit from that also..  My mom has attended a couple of alanon classes and she said she enjoyed them, she may get back to attending them again in the future...  I realize too that everything happens for a reason...  Who knows maybe in the future I will be able to help someone who is going through some of the same stuff I have gone through in my life, sort of like a mentor to them...  I know even though the experiences.. most of them anyway.. have not been pleasant ones... they have most definitely made me a stronger person.  Like or hate my parents??? Well as stated in the beginning of this post.. I do love my parents, I am just kind of estranged from my dad and I am always on guard with him..  Not to make light of the situation but its kind of like what Forrest Gump said, "Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know whatcha gonna get". Gotta take the bitter with the sweet, the hard with the chewy and even the yucky raspberry ones.




Bintsy<33