YOU BASTARD JOHN!!
J/P buddy, its cool... Although I only got 2 hours of sleep that night...
Hows the woman takin it?

i think we should move that story about john and dng in photo album in here... thats funny as!
someone quote-post it here..

Okay here it is... In the words of DNG-----


OOOOH boy.. Do I got an embarressing drinking story for you guys...

Alright... One time, Me and John and Mike decided it would be great to have a camp out in the woods by John's house (John lives in the middle of nowhere).. So naturally we decided to get f-ing tanked... and John ends up drinking a whole bottle of schnapps.. Rasberry.. I think.. Me and Mike get pretty tanked on just the beer, but that besides the point... John is really hammered, he started puking a little bit, and passing out all over the place.. so I picked him up and threw him in the tent (Johns a little guy, mind you).. So Me and Mike eventually head off to bed... Later that night, I wake up to John humping my leg, or doing something.. so I'm like "John.. WHAT THE *#*&%$%^#% ARE YOU DOING!?" So he stands up, unzips, and pisses alllllllllll over me.. ALL over... not just a little bit.. but like a LONG pee... So I get all pissed and beat him up, and rub his face in it and stuff, and he goes back to sleep.. Theres urine all over the tent, except for where Mike are sleeping, so me and Mike end up in 1 sleeping bag (this isn't like Australia or anything... its F-ING COLD outside..)... John wakes up the next morning all happy and giddy, and has absolutely no clue what had happened the night before... it was terrible...

LOL, i heard about that b4. But its still funny now

Australia does get cold outside. Were not a desert you know...

actually we are... pretty much

yea, but now i'm done.
FOREVER

Its really hard on my gf
Cuz i can't talk on my house or cell anymore
I have to use pay phones and s***. I'm desperate!

Wow.... Not too many drinkers.... Well I guess I will throw a story out there. After a rather horrible night, we thought to start drinking and maybe cheer up a bit. After a lot of booze we wonder over to a wedding that was happening, and crashed it I lost the others I was with and wondered onto the dance floor, couldn't dance alone so I asked a random girl, she actually said yes but she could of been ugly my sight was a little blurry, after the dance I just walked away from her and went to the mini bar and they wouldn't serve me so I grabed one of there Tiki torches and ran off laughing & nearly burned a house down. The kicker is that it was the mayors daughters wedding HA HA!

Lol. Woulda been funnier if you were dancing with the mayors daughter to.

This isn't really my drinking story, but the other day, bout 1am, was SMSing some chick from the other side of our country, and she was out at a pub and all her friends ditched her. So she had to walk like.. a 30min drive. To cut a long story short, she rang me and didnt stop laughing for like.. 5mins. And i talked to her for 2 and a half hours until she got home safely.

some times the storys them self arent so great but the aftermarth is, like in mine...

John, Dan, Andrew, Some Guy, Some Guys GF and Me were all at my mates mums place she wasnt home

It was Johns BDAY so we were celebrating as you do and after drinkin a bottle of rum with coke, random shots of Smirnoff and Smirnoff Black then Rum Fanta Smirnoff... Thing... the party really started...

Drunk DOA 4ing, which looked trippy as... Mega high depth colors funny noises and trippy kung fu moves, it was all a blur and no matter what we did we all ended up in laughter...

By the end of the night Dan decided to eat a Doriehto (cant spell it... Basically a Corn Chip...) and threw up in the bag... Andrew threw up in the bed he was sleeping in wakin in the morning.. Yes... he slept in it... i threw up out side ... Infront of the stares ... SO it was a bit messy out there... atleast it was eattin by the dog...

oh and i slept on a wooden floor... it was very painful in the morning... stiff neck and back... no hangover... and oddly enough i donno what happened to The GUy and his GF and John on his on bday party wasnt sick... not that any of us saw anyway

Vodka Poker = ffa Fun For All

Poker is that s*** while drinking, Ok I got another one, after a night of playin poker drinkin shots of jag and drinkin beer, I needed to get home, didn't have a ride, well some one with a truck (later found out he was drunk) Was leaving I tried to catch the ride, but he started off so I ran up and jumped on the back of the truck, not in the bed but right at the bumper of it. He cruised along and skipped a stop sign and went onto the highway, I was stilll trying to get myself lifted into the bed of the truck (the back part) I was too drunk to lift myself over into it, so I was dragging along on the highway going about 55-60 I thought I was gonna die or get serious road rash, but I held on for about 2-3 miles, and when he got to down town P-city I finally let go tired as hell, got my face all scraped up, what a ride that was, he told me that he felt some weight back there but didn't know I was hanging back there, needless to say they had a good laugh, I caught up to them when they stopped at a stoplight, and gave me a ride home. Damn that was fun, wrecked my shoes though...... bummer

Oh jimmy you crazy cat. That one cracks me up. I can still remember when i first came back from basic and mike f**ked a fat b*tch. Wasn't that a riot. Then glenn tried to explain it to her that mike ment it in a good way.

Okay now were talking ! I could go all night with drinking stories but ill only tell you one of the funniest .. A couple of my friends and I were smoking euh.... a "magical cigarette" in the back of a bar and then there is this big fat chick that get out of the bar with a little skinny guy. ( only half way and already hilarious )Suddenly my friend screamed to the guy " HEY DUDE YOUR GIRL IS FAT ! " and then he started burfing like hell all over the floor LOL You could almort see a tear in the b**** eyes it was funny ... you should have been there !

That's just f***ed up. So what if she is fat? Over half the country is fat.

But anyways, I am a social drinker myself. Most of my family is nothing but alcoholics, but I've noticed that it is largely mentality that encourages that. I have no interest in being an alcoholic, and I am way too f***ing picky in what I drink for it to happen. I prefer beer to hard liquor, but I like good beer... dark beers like Newcastle or Fat Tire... in fact the only mainstream beer I will drink is Sam Adams. So yeah, no 24 packs of Bud Light for me, I f***ing hate the s***.

So yeah... my drinking stories. I have a few.

1) When I was about 16 or so I got drunk at school. A classmate at brought in a bottle of orange juice that was really filled 1/4 of the way with vodka. No one could tell I was drunk except my best friend, and when I asked how she could tell she said it was because I was more coordinated than usual. No hangover.

2) When I was 19 we were having a party at my friend's house and there was of course much in the way of booze... mostly smirnoff triple black (I miss that stuff, can't find it now). We were all drunk and playing D&D, and we started getting hungry. My friend Pat and I were soberest, so we went on a food run to Jack in the Box and ordered about $40 worth of food. When we pulled up to the window to pay they asked if we were high and we replied "No, we're gamers". They were puzzled. But we had ordered so much food that they gave us two little cakes for free. We made the run, we claimed the cakes.

3) Later that same night, after more drinking, we learn that Pat is a giddy drunk. As he runs around telling everyone that he is drunk is a excited higher pitched voice. Normally Pat is about as much as an a**h*** as you can manage and still like the guy.

4) Same party. My friend Tom talks me into trying a drink called a Flaming Dr. Pepper. It consisted of a shot that was half amaretto and half 151, lit on fire and then dropped into a class of Coke. It tastes just like Dr. Pepper, which is freaky. Problem is that me drinking Coke at all, especially warm, makes me sick. Combined with Jack in the Box and 151 I was not a happy camper. Neither was Pat or our hostess. The three of us felt really sick all night, but none of us threw up. Just really nauseated. That was my first hangover.

5) My 21st birthday... better known as the day my alcohol tolerance went out the window. So for my official entry into the legal drinking age, my boyfriend took me to a bar at midnight. I had the following drinks, I am not sure what is in them but you can look them up online: sip of a Black & Tan, Four Horsemen, Long Island Ice Tea, Zombie, Liquid Cocaine, and a Bloody Mary (worst I have ever had). I broke a glass playing pool because the table was too close to the billiard table and when I went to shoot I knocked the glass off. Apparently it happens a lot there. But yeah, I got massively sick from those drinks and it was the first time I puked from being drunk. My hangover lasted pretty much the entire next day.

6) Pat had a beer tasting party in 2007. Everyone had to bring a different type of beer that others had not tried before. It was a lot of fun, we hung out by his pool and he made food. Great times. Then it came time to go home. I was really drunk, but more sober than my boyfriend... and it was my car, so I drove. That's right, I drove drunk. However, I knew that I was drunk, so I was insanely cautious and my boyfriend's house was not that far away. Got to his house with no problem and hoped to hang out there until I sobered up because my house was a 15 minute drive away. His mom wouldn't let me stay because she was in one of her "no one is allowed over" moods, so I had to drive home while still drunk. There was a cop behind me for about four blocks, and never once did suspect that I was intoxicated because I didn't weave or swerve, I even went two miles over the speed limit so as to not tip them off that something was amiss. I will never drive drunk again, but the sheer stress actually sobered me up quite a bit.

7) September 2007, I threw my friend a birthday party. The aim was to get her drunk, so we had ample booze. One friend climbed my tree in the front yard, then realized she had to jump to get down... the impact made her puke. That was the only puking really. I got really wasted because there was jagermeister and we decided to make monster bombs with it (monster energy drink + jager). Well, I found out jager makes me sick, as does monster because I got really sick later... like could not keep dpwn water sick. And had a two day hangover, the first day spent curled up on the couch in the fetal position. I will never drink jager again, it is satan.

Those are my stories, hope you enjoyed them.

I smoked for almost 10 years and there's no going back for me.. If you smoke you should quit because in the long run it takes it toll one way or the other. I've noticed since quitting that my body is a lot healthier.. That smokers cough and mourning flem is gone.. Do yourself a favor and throw your pack in the garbage.

I don't like drinking. I usually drink 1 or sometimes 2 glasses of red wine, because I usually lose control of myself.
One day, when I had some more glasses, I almost fell into a hole one the ground

ive got tons but hre is one that i still feel to this day

About 3 years ago my friend had a party and it got raided so me and a couple of friends decided to go walk around and check out the neighboorhood we were in. So we come upon this chain link fence that was loosely chained up. So we all start to jump it but by this time im feeling pretty good, and a basically didnt take the fences stability into my judgement. So when i tryed to kick off away from it like swung out. I landed really bad on my ankle. So we return to the house and my friends are all like "lets go back, lets go back" and "your being such a b**** you just fell down thats it". They thought that I just wanted to stay their because this female was there. But the next morning I woke up my foot was all black and blue and was totally swollen. Never went to the doctor and when its cold i can feel a pain. Lesson of the story jumping poorly made fences kills, and so does being a jackass

Ooh, I like this thread!

Okay, so at a friend's party, the host went upstairs with his girlfriend to umm... well, you know. Anyway, an hour or two passes, and then he comes to the front door downstairs buttnaked with a pillow covering himself...! Apparently, he was so drunk still that he fell out of the balcony upstairs and the next door neighbor, some elderly lady, came outside to help him and give him a pillow to cover up! She walked him back over to the party lolol.

I personally don't do stupid things no matter how drunk I get, all I do is dance all over anyone and everyone who is around me

Originally posted by tonetone714

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ive got tons but hre is one that i still feel to this day

About 3 years ago my friend had a party and it got raided so me and a couple of friends decided to go walk around and check out the neighboorhood we were in. So we come upon this chain link fence that was loosely chained up. So we all start to jump it but by this time im feeling pretty good, and a basically didnt take the fences stability into my judgement. So when i tryed to kick off away from it like swung out. I landed really bad on my ankle. So we return to the house and my friends are all like "lets go back, lets go back" and "your being such a wimp* you just fell down thats it". They thought that I just wanted to stay their because this female was there. But the next morning I woke up my foot was all black and blue and was totally swollen. Never went to the doctor and when its cold i can feel a pain. Lesson of the story jumping poorly made fences kills, and so does being a idiot*

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* Edited for swearing

This one time, I had some martini.
It was disgusting and I almost threw up from one sip.
The end.

I've never gotten drunk. For some reason I get to the point of just falling asleep, maybe that's drunk? But on to my story:
one night after having had a few beers, I fell asleep like normal, only to wake up to peeing onto the carpet from the couch I was laying on. Good times and I always make sure i take a good whiz before falling asleep while drinking.